As I was coaching one of my private clients a while ago it dawned on me: Women would benefit greatly if they could learn to think more like men when it comes to dating. Debriefing Debbie’s Date and Response to His “Disappearance” Here’s what I gave her as answers to her many questions: It doesn’t. Instead of recognizing his bad behavior and realizing that he did her a favor by disappearing, she was latched on to her initial impression of him…which was based on a few paragraphs in a profile and 1.5 hours with him drinking coffee.
Here’s “Debbie’s” story, but it’s typical of what I hear time and time again from women who are dating. First, you’ve gone out with about 12 guys in the past few months, and this great-date-then-disappearing-act thing has happened twice. Although she was a woman dating after 40 − Debbie was 54 − it didn’t change what she’d been doing with men all her life: Hitching her wagon to a fantasy.
In fact, quite a few have completely stopped dating because the constant rejection or disinterest from men over 50 has become too painful for them. If you expect love to come in words, you could be waiting a very long time. If you do this, they'll do anything you want, which leads us to Tip 5. Otherwise, the next time you ask for help, he'll tell you to hire a handyman.
(And I think that could be somewhat awkward, don’t you? One of two things tend to happen due to your high expectations (and hopes for this one guy): 1. Discover, Don’t Decide The purpose of dating isn’t to get a man to like you or make a guy fit your expectations so you can finally say you found someone.
You judge him too critically and don’t give him a chance. You try to make him fit into the “maybe he’s the one” category and overlook clear signals that he’s wrong for you. Even though they may be seriously looking for a lifetime partner, most men go on dates thinking something like, “I hope she’s attractive and nice. Dating is all about DISCOVERING whether he has potential to be your guy as you get to know him.
John Gray says that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, and I agree. They keep their personal business to themselves rather than seeking attention for it.
So, let’s take a look at what we can learn from our Martian brothers. They strive to be brave and show no weakness, only strength.
At the end of the date, they both agreed they wanted to see each other again. She was excited, and had that thing going in her mind. But the end of this story was not happy: That was the only date they had. He did call once but didn’t call back when he said he would. By the time Debbie and I connected, this entire story had transpired. You know: down the rumination rabbit hole, where we gals can’t help but go. And the kicker is, while she was spending all her energy on a relationship that never existed, she wasn’t responding to the dozens of men in her inbox who were waiting for her attention. That shiny thing could have been another woman, his job or maybe some family thing.
It could have been the realization that she was nice and all, but not a woman who could be His One. But he found something he’d rather do, or he chose not to spend more time with her. I mean, after all, they only had one short coffee date. After one short date, he was not yet invested in her at all.
"Medications that are prescribed for stroke issues and heart issues can have devastating effects on sexual functioning," explains Dr.
Janice Epp of the Institute of Advanced Study of Human Sexuality.
I'd like to share with you eight tips about men that you can start using right away. This means don't expect a man to act like a woman or you're guaranteed to be disappointed. Men over 50 love when you bring their masculinity out in them. Men tell me again and again how much they dislike profiles of women who demand nothing less than the best restaurants or a certain salary to date them.
I've had clients use this advice and go from zero dates on their calendars to men falling over themselves to get to know these ladies better. Men have had enough of the demands put on them at work and from ex's.
In addition, researchers have found that a family of antidepressants known as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRI) can take the winds right out of your sails.