(Riccardo and other Couchsurfing users quoted in this article asked to be identified by pseudonyms.) On the business front, the crowdsourced hospitality site has been experiencing a rough patch lately.
After a controversial transition to a for-profit model in 2011, which brought million in funding in the past two years, growing pains have set in.
Limit the guess-work by being open and honest; it can bring you closer. Remember those things you did when you were romancing your new love?
Make a list and do them again now, suggests Paul N. He is the co-author of The I Factor: Simple Insights for Connecting in Your Personal Relationships.
“My first Couchsurfing hookup happened when I was staying with my friend in Miami,” Riccardo recalls. Months later Riccardo got a phone call from the same girl, asking if she could stay at his place in New York City. “I never talked to her again,” he admits, adding, “I mean, we’re friends on Facebook.” Couchsurfing was born after a budget-conscious traveler named Casey Fenton sent out a mass request for accommodations in Iceland and received 50 invitations from students with a free spare futon.
“He has a studio and was hosting two girls from France.” He slept on an inflatable air mattress with one girl, while his friend shared his bed with the other. Fenton soon realized people all over the world might not mind sharing their extra space gratis while making new friends in the process.
The trick is to pick something fun and exciting, not just pleasant. Try one-on-one activities like tennis, racquetball, skiing, hiking, or fishing. Brush against him in a sexually seductive way," says Meyers.
"So many couples hold back kissing, touching, or holding each other until they have time or the desire to have sex," says Meyers. Researchers have found that affectionate touch boosts the body's feel-good hormones. "Affection is a way to make love all day outside of the bedroom." Having fun during sex, instead of doing it for obligation's sake, can stoke the fires of your relationship. "There is nothing sexier than a smile and a happy partner," says Campbell. Maybe it's having an exciting career or training for a half marathon. When you love yourself and your life, you bring more energy and interest into your relationship.
I want to have three days with somebody I can talk with.
Not somebody just empty.” In Riccardo’s case, it all starts with a request for approval — from his pal in Miami. “There’s more people coming to New York than Miami, so he’s always like, ‘You bastard! ”1 He got a little closer on his second try, a girl from Slovakia with blonde hair (his weakness) and small, dark, squinty eyes.
"It's amazing what getting out of your normal routine and pushing your comfort boundaries will do for your love life," says Sheri Meyers, Psy D.
She's the author of Chatting or Cheating: How to Detect Infidelity, Rebuild Love and Affair-Proof Your Relationship. Another option is to get competitive, suggests Rachel De Alto, a communication and relationship expert in Point Pleasant, N. "When you're physically competing and experiencing new things together, those dopamine levels soar, which replicates those early butterflies and gets you excited," she says. "Whisper sweet and adoring things into your partner's ear.
"Sex is the playground of a marriage," says Campbell. "Independence and a sense of purpose are sexy," explains Campbell.